Cut out the middleman and consult Facebook yourself!

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If you really need all the help you can get, then maybe you should see a residency-trained, board-certified physician.

Cut out the middleman and consult Facebook yourself!
Photo by freestocks / Unsplash

If you haven't yet taken your daily recommended dose of irony, then look no further, because we've got it right here. In fact, we've got a double dose, since this particular social media consult involves not one, but two midlevel nurse practitioners! The anonymous OP, who is apparently a little more than five weeks pregnant, has a history of infertility and pregnancy loss/miscarriage further complicated by anxiety and some sort of mood or psychiatric disorder. This combination of risk factors would certainly be a pretty straightforward indication to start seeing a high-risk pregnancy specialist, i.e. a residency-trained OB/GYN physician who has completed further fellowship training in the subspecialty field of maternal-fetal medicine, and possibly also a psychiatrist (NOT a nurse practitioner.) But, predictably enough, this knocked-up midlevel is instead seeing another APRN (advanced practice registered nurse, another term for midlevel nurse practitioner).

By the way, can we have a conversation about the seemingly endless word salad of terms that midlevel NPs use to refer to each other? APRN, ARNP, CNP, CRNP, APP...of course, none of these alphabet-soup acronyms possess the clarity, succinctness, and prestige of "physician".

Hilariously enough, by the anonymous OP's own admittance, her midlevel NP doesn't know left from right when it comes to perinatal prescribing. Considering how potentially difficult it is to abort fetuses and deal with the aftermath of miscarriages in today's post-Roe v. Wade world, it might - just might - be a good idea to put the health of yourself and your future child in the hands of a competent physician instead of some clueless midlevel "APRN" who is "willing to follow my lead". Seriously, what the fuck? Who's treating who here? It's like the blind leading the blind, in reverse! One thing's for certain: this pregnancy isn't likely to go anywhere good with two clueless midlevel nurse practitioners at the helm.