"Dr." CeCe Brooks, DNP - "The Discovery Doc"

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Whenever I'm feeling sad, I take out my medical school diploma and start caressing it.

Here we have another noctor by the name of CeCe Brooks, also known as Caroline Brooks, whose "right" to use the term "Doctor" comes from her online Doctor of Nursing Practice (DNP), courtesy of Florida International University. CeCe calls herself "The Discovery Doc" and runs a business under the same name. She's even kind and self-aware enough to make a TikTok video to explain to the general public why they should call her "Doctor":

CeCe/Caroline starts off the video by describing how some people are "butthurt" about how she is entitled to call herself "Doctor". No, ma'am, we're not butthurt over how entitled you are. We're butthurt because you, and everyone else who calls themself "Doctor" in the context of a clinical setting while caring for patients, is misleading patients and blurring the lines between physicians (who actually have a medical doctorate) and non-physician practitioners. It's not really up for debate that in a medical setting, the term "Doctor" de facto refers to a physician, not some midlevel with a Doctor of Nursing Practice. Don't forget to check the disclaimer on her website, where this is conveniently buried at the very end where everyone is sure to read it:


In the next part of the video (which is perhaps the most cringey), CeCe/Caroline proudly shows off her framed diploma/toilet paper showing that she obtained a Doctor of Nursing Practice from Florida International University. Unlike an actual doctorate (for example, a medical doctorate obtained at a medical school) FIU's website proclaims, "The [DNP] program's convenient online courses will easily fit into the busy schedule of the working professional nurse". Only 36 credit hours, and no GRE required! Jesus fucking Christ, have you ever seen a physician (even one who graduated from Harvard Med) lack enough self-awareness to masturbate over their diploma on video? I sure as hell haven't.

CeCe/Caroline then attempts to cite this bullshit 2008 joint statement from the Nurse Practitioner Roundtable as further justification for why people should call her a "Doctor":


You contradicted yourself, honey! It's an academic credential! Sure, plenty of people have PhDs and other terminal doctorates. University professors, lawyers, priests, and engineers, to name a few. Last time we checked, none of those professions were prancing around in a clinic or on the hospital wards, providing care to patients while calling themselves "Doctors". When a patient says that they are "want to see the doctor", they sure as hell aren't referring to a nurse practitioner with an DNP! We also find the above statement's last claim that recognizing the title "Doctor" for doctorally prepared nurse practitioners "facilitates parity within the health care system." Parity? Parity with what exactly? Parity with an attending physician who completed four years of medical school, three or more years of residency, and possibly more years of fellowship? Parity between a 36-credit hour, 100%-online program, often at a for-profit diploma mill where the only admission requirements are a wallet and a warm body with a pulse, with a reputable four-year medical school with single-digit admission rates? Where the majority of medical school applicants don't get into a single one? What a fucking joke. Don't even try to make the comparison.